Yikes, Mary appears to has disappeared down a pentagonal vortex ---- and a few hours later has reappeared as a cat. This isn't Harry Potter Mary!
Graham - since you are probably taking cover in a hole in the garden protected by a dustbin lid I assume that little slap around the thighs didn't leave you with gushing wounds. If so tie up with sheets and reach for the fortisip.
By the way, the ex did it because computer games demanded 3 initials in the high score lists. I wonder if Benoit did it for the same reason?